the food adventure continues

We are still working on getting Rafa to try a variety of foods and most importantly to us, to eat some stinkin' vegetables.

We decided to just serve him broccoli at lead once almost every day. Maybe he just needed to get used to seeing it. We have not had repeatable results, but our nanny sent me this video.

Woohoo!!

We have also tried to get veggies into dishes he likes. Since he's a big time oatmeal eater in the morning, that meant pumpkin oatmeal, until we ran out of canned pumpkin... Which we can't seem to find in stores. I guess we'll have to wait until this fall. We sometimes also have smoothies with silken tofu and spinach for a fairly complete meal. I also recently tried what my generation knows as fruit roll ups, but with a healthy dose of kale and spinach. For whatever reason, that looked palatable to Rafa and he loves it. I guess there will be more dehydrating in our future. We are trying to be patient about it, but definitely celebrate these moments watching our child consume something with any hint of a vegetable in it.

they just make me smile

gender stuff

Recently, I've noticed that Sylvia is starting to assign certain colors to herself and to Rafa.  And it sort of makes me bristle.  She saves everything pink, purple, red, and yellow for herself, and everything blue, green, brown, and gray for Rafa.  I think that part of it has to do with their clothes.  Almost all of their clothes are hand-me-downs, which we LOVE and are SO grateful for.  But, it also means that most of her clothes are very girly (pink) and his are very boy (blue).  OK, so with his blue eyes, the blue looks pretty fantastic on him.  Well, and we probably tended to give her the sippy cups with pink lids and him the ones with green lids just so that we could keep them apart. 

But, the problem for me is that I'm in the middle of processing many of the things going on right now related to women's rights and the discussions about women in positions of leadership.  The short version is that it makes me really upset to see how the few women there are in politics are treated by their male counterparts, which is particularly poignant as they deal with women's issues (see the Texas Senate).  Then there's the recent Supreme Court ruling related to harassment of women in the workplace.  There are so many things that make it hard for women to be leaders.  This is what the recent public discussions led by Anne-Marie Slaughter and Sheryl Sandberg (and kept going by many others) have been about.  External barriers and internal struggles preventing women from being leaders and finding balance between work and family. 

One thing I'm convinced of is that society teaches our daughters at a VERY early age certain behaviors that are detrimental to them becoming leaders in the future.  We generally tend to chastise girls for being bossy when the same behaviors in boys is overlooked.  Because we're generally more comfortable with men taking leadership roles.  Sylvia definitely rules the roost in our house.  Rafa is starting to exhibit his preferences and desires and exert some will over his sister.  But, Sylvia cares for him and answers questions for him and tends to be more aggressive in getting what she wants if it conflicts with him.  We try to be fair and balanced and make sure that they each get time to do what they want, but after some of the research I've recently read, I'm hyper sensitive to make sure that I'm not quenching some of Sylvia's traits that will help her be a great leader one day. 

OK, so that has nothing to do with colors.  Not exactly.  But sort of.  I generally think that at this age, the kids should be free to explore without adult intervention all of their likes and dislikes.  Whether it's what color they like, what toys they like, what they wear, whether they snuggle or run, and on and on.  Our former nanny came over and brought each child some clothes.  Sylvia got two dresses and Rafa got some cute boy clothes.  We were wondering if Sylvia had already grown into the dresses, which are a few sizes bigger than what we generally put her in, so our former nanny put one on Sylvia over her clothes to see.  Well, then Rafa wanted to wear the other dress.  And I think that's okay.  I probably still won't elect to put him in dresses every day, but if he wants to play dress up in a dress or wear what his sister is wearing, so be it.

Now, the tricky part to me is that our current nanny also recently brought gifts for the kids (we apparently don't buy enough things for them...).  I can live with gendered gifts.  I am grateful for others' generosity and if girly things for Sylvia and boy things for Rafa make the giver happy, no problem.  Sylvia got a bunch of Minnie things and Rafa a bunch of Thomas the Train things.  The main thing that's a challenge for me is that Sylvia's Minnie things say on them: I'm so pretty!  Now, of course I want Sylvia to always think of herself as pretty, both inside and out.  But, I don't want that to be what identifies her and the first thing she's looking for.  Good thing she can't read!  I recently read a great article about how a woman's first instinct in meeting a girl is to comment on how pretty she is or how cute her clothes are.  I must admit, I have done that!  Have I ever done it for a boy?  Probably not...  Again, being pretty and wearing cute clothes is great.  But, it shouldn't be defining.  We are teaching our girls that their value is all about their looks. 

I'm certainly still sorting through how to deal with all of these gender issues, both for myself and in rearing my children.  And it will be a lifelong battle, I'm sure.  And, I'm also learning how quick these little kids pick up on even small things that we do and say.  Oh, be careful little mouth what you say!  Probably more appropriate for me than for the kids...

name game (take III)

Here we are again, pondering one of the little decisions that will have a long-term impact on baby 3.  I enjoy tossing around different names and trying to find the right fit.  It can certainly be a challenge, though!  I wrote about Round 1 here and Round 2 here.  My post during Round 2 has some of the factors we are taking into consideration. 

Here's where we are as of today, ask me again tomorrow.

As was in the past, we're having an easier time with girl names.  Our two finalists are Sabrina and Cecilia.  D leans a little more towards Sabrina because he likes it better.  I don't love the idea of having two "S" names, but it's more for practical reasons of being able to label things.  Just in the last week, we started thinking about middle names and so we haven't spent a lot of time on it, but we both initially like the idea of Lynn (from D's mom) or Lin (then all the kids would have a nod to my Chinese background in their middle names, while still deriving the inspiration from D's mom).

And then there's the debate over the boy names...  Which was harder for us with Rafa as well.  Our short list has three names on it: Nicolas (Nico), Oscar, and Felix.  I don't love Nicolas and really don't like Nick, but I do like the nickname Nico. (KNEE-coh)  So, we could just go with Nico, but I do like it more as a nickname than a given name.  I really like both Oscar and Felix (and have never seen the Odd Couple, so that's not where the names came from).  D is not really sold on either of those, but doesn't love Nicolas, either.  More luke-warm on all of them, as far as I can tell.  But, we haven't come up with anything we like better.  We are leaning towards John as the middle name, which is D's dad's and older brother's name. 

We're still open for suggestions and thoughts!!  Although, the longer we go without any other alternatives, the more these will likely settle in our brains and hearts. 

the supermoon

As part of our 10-year anniversary celebration, we decided to get take out dinner and relax together for a lovely, casual intimate dinner for two.  And then we learned that our decisions are not the only factor in determining the outcome of our evenings...

Our kids are generally great sleepers.  And fairly good self-soothers.  Sylvia sometimes takes 30 minutes to an hour to settle down, but she usually sings or babbles or plays with her stuffed animals and is generally pleasant about it.  And by usually, I mean, pretty much always.  Except when we decide to have a celebratory, romantic dinner, apparently.  We did our normal bedtime routine and called in the order to be picked up right when we anticipated putting the kids to bed.  Bath, teeth, books, songs, and into bed went the kids.  As we made our way for the door, Sylvia started crying hysterically.  Not just the crying that we've had in the past that lasted less than 5 minutes when we left the room, but the "someone cut off my finger" kind of crying.  Since she hasn't cried much lately, I just figured she's older and maybe has more gusto.  D went to get our food.  And Sylvia continued her full body sobbing, screaming, bawling, creating a giant puddle in her bed, mess.  I also figured that kind of crying would wear her out and she'd be asleep in no time.  I have a lot to learn.

Over the course of the next hour and a half (plus), Sylvia continued her hysteria.  We each made a couple trips up to check on her.  No dirty diaper.  No fever.  In fact, she stopped crying the second we touched her.  So, probably no ear infection or other pain, either.  As soon as we moved away, though, she started whimpering and if we got to the door, hysteria ensued.  We kept thinking that she's wear herself out.  We still have a lot to learn. 

D eventually had enough and went up to rescue her from whatever was torturing her.  He brought her downstairs to be with him for awhile.  Fortunately, Rafa was tired enough that he didn't get upset about being left behind.  When I went up to check on Sylvia he had the sweetest look of pleading concern on his face.  He seemed to be telling me to make it better so she would be okay.  Or, so he could sleep.  After Sylvia had been up hours past her bedtime, D decided to try again with bed.  She cried a little, but was probably tired enough at that point that she gave in to sleep.

Then we learned that there was a supermoon.  I still don't know what I think about the possibility that it is affecting her sleep.  On the one hand, the tides are influenced by the moon, and that's pretty powerful.  On the other hand, it just seems a little nutty that it could have such an effect.  But then there's this uncanny coincidence.  We don't have these nights very often, but it's coincided at least 3 times with the full moon.  I think this was the first time.

Although I was a little nervous about the adjustment and what that mean for their sleeping, the next night, we moved the twoddlers into their new room to make room for Baby 3.  And Sylvia went back to her old ways.  Just playing and singing in bed.  And discovering that she could reach the doorknob and open and close the door from standing in her crib.  She's now a little further away.  But that's 100x better than hysteria.

fun with hats

la playa

manzanas

Just another example of how different the twoddlers are. This is how they each chose to eat their apples...

daily walk

After dinner, we try to take a walk each night. So far, we just go around one block. I love this time with the kids. They love exploring. I can also see how much they love routine. They point out the same things every time.

Today, D is out of town, so I decided to send a little video to D of the twoddlers running down the sidewalk. And luckily captured this:

And while it was the first time, it might also be the last. You can tell at the end of the video that while Rafa wants to carry on, Sylvia wants nothing to do with it. That's how the next 5 minutes went, Rafa being rejected over and over again. Poor guy.

hello summer

Hopefully I'll get a chance to write more about our trip. When we left, if was blissfully cool for spring in Houston. When we got back, however, summer had happened. That was a little bit of a shock since we came back from highs in the 50s. So, we signed up for swim class.

This morning we had our first session in the pool. The kids did great. Rafa had gotten up super early this morning, was a little tired and required a little more coaxing. But, they both did some kicking and at least at times were comfortable on their backs (not as much their tummies) in the water. We were not as successful convincing them to blow bubbles in the water. Maybe next time.

After about 45 minutes, we for them dressed and they were pooped! To the point of lying down on the concrete to rest. No wonder parents get pools for their homes. Purely to wear out the kids, I think!

traveling with twins?, no problem

For the first few hours, anyway.

The twoddlers LOVED the airport. The moving sidewalks were a huge hit. Lots of giggles and pure enjoyment exploring. So many people to check out. Big hallways to cruise down. Huge windows to look out with airplanes and trucks and all kinds of activity. We did our best to wear them out before our first flight of a double header.




I wish I could have captured Sylvia's giggling.




Rafa already looks like he was ready for a nap, but that didn't stop the excitement of the new playground!

And it worked. Less than 5 minutes after takeoff and...




OK, so that was a little bit of a dream. We were so excited that they crashed and snoozed for most of the first flight that we were unable to really take advantage and don't really sleep. But, if we were wise, that's what our first flight would have actually looked like.

bath fun