Friday, April 29, 2016

go away

At our Wednesday night church (different than our Sunday morning church, because who doesn't need 2 church families praying for you with 3 kids), after music class, our kiddos went outside to play. I loved watching S hanging out with some older girls and engaging without hesitation. My kiddos are growing up!

Then, the other girls ran off and I called to S to come over and not go inside with them. She came over and angrily told me that the girls had told her to "go away!" and she burst into tears. And I received my first opportunity to try to help my child navigate the social world. 

I knew this was a temporary pain and that she would get past it, but I did want her to experience the heartbreak and rejection while snuggled in my embrace. So, I let her cry a little. And I loved her. And then I told her that just because they didn't want to be with her at the moment that it didn't mean they didn't love her.  I reminded her that she doesn't always want to play with her little brother, but that doesn't mean that she doesn't love him. And I told her that sometimes our hearts will hurt. But we have lots of things that fill our hearts. 

And while it hurt my heart to see her hurt, I know she's now a little stronger. She will probably still be heartbroken the next time it happens, but hopefully she'll also be a little stronger until one day, when her heart is broken, she won't need my embrace and reassurance to pick herself up and dust herself off and move on. 


5 comments:

Jason Edwards said...

Aww. Poor S. Those moments are hard.. you did well.

Tia Tere said...

Well done!!!! Dale un abrazo de mi parte!!!!!

David Vassar said...

And a special shout out to Oma for making S the fly lid for her head in this photo (am I within 10 years of current lingo??)

Therapy Shirl said...

What a lovely way you handled a difficult growing-up situation.

C said...

Thanks, all! I truly have no idea where it came from. I just went with it on the spot. Which doesn't necessarily give me much hope for future parenting challenges. At least I'll have this moment to look back on after then next 3 million times I botch the parental response. This parenting thing is no joke.