I'm backtracking a little because this is something that occurred, oh, like the day we found out we were pregnant with twins... Everyone always says there is never a good time to have kids. (Have you noticed that everyone gives us lots of advice? See previous post.) I'm at the stage in my career where I've developed the legal skills to be a good lawyer, now I just need to rack up more experience points and get a few more clients of my own. That's when I'll be able to fly solo and not have to rely on my partners, and therefore no longer be at their mercy. Sort of like the transformation from a child to an independent adult. In some ways, it's just the next step and not everyone has to take it, but it also is what will give me job security and more of the ability to be the queen of my destiny. OK, you get the picture.
So, right during the glow of FINALLY getting pregnant after so much stress, tears, drugs, hormonal outbursts, etc., I got--the call. An organization that I have been "wooing" for awhile was looking for proposals from lawyers to represent them on 3 major transactions. They decided to invite me, little ol' me, and a giant firm who also does lots and lots of this particular work. The catch: the first transactions is scheduled to close at the end of this year, yup, right at the end of my 3-4 months of maternity leave. For reals?!?! I peppered them with questions, assured them of my abilities, then told them I would get back with them about the proposal, hung up the phone, and my heart sank. This is the call that a young lawyer dreams about (or maybe it's just me). Affirmation that I'm competing with the big boys and girls. An opportunity to land a client that would bring in 3 major transactions over the course of 2 years. My career is taking off! And then, BONK, I crash into the glass ceiling. Since I'm the one at my firm with the expertise, I decided that it was only right that even though there are brilliant and capable attorneys here, I needed to explain to them that I would be otherwise occupied for the months leading up to the first closing when the bulk of the work would occur. Unfortunately, that's just not what the client wants, methinks. In any case, they told me congratulations, they would think about it and discuss internally and get back with me. Yeah...don't call us, we'll call you...I know what that means.
It just felt so unfair that I have to leave the workforce to bear children and here's a clear example of how it directly affects my career. Don't get me wrong, I would NEVER trade being pregnant with landing the client. My male partner, very insightfully pointed out that the disappointment was compounded by the fact that we have been trying so hard and this opportunity came so early in the pregnancy. It ruined my day, I just couldn't shake being totally bummed about the missed opportunity (not to mention a really awesome and fun client). But, it didn't ruin the next day. And even now, I remember how disappointed I was, but it is just a memory of disappointment. I believe that there will be many more opportunities to land wonderful clients in the future. If I can do it now, I can do it again! Right?...
In other news, we got the Baby Bargains book and are trying to prepare ourselves for the daunting task of shopping. For those that don't know us, shopping is not high on either of our lists... We have been told that I need to do everything I want to be a part of before 24 weeks, so I guess we'll have to get started on educating ourselves on cribs, bassinets, strollers, car seats, bottles, pumps, swaddlers, pack n plays, swings, bouncers (I don't even know what half those things are)... Typically conversation in our house about these things:
D: This book recommends a convertible car seat.
C: Well, I do have a convertible, but... What's a convertible car seat?
D: Dunno.
C: Is there a picture?
Yeah, Babies R Us salesperson is going to LOVE us...
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